"In your wildest fantasy you're in Hell? And you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil?"

Apparently I have difficulty distinguishing between mentally handicapped and just plain drunk.

This became problematic recently when a strange man began talking to me at a bus stop. I usually avoid these kind of situations by simply using my headphones. But this particular evening I wanted to soak up the awesomeness and celebration that was everywhere on the streets of DC
He thought I looked "blue" and wanted to cheer me up. (Sidenote: I was in fact a bit blue, because it was just before midnight on November 5th, Barack Obama had just won the election, and I had spent the entire evening working my menial retail job instead of watching returns and celebrating with my friends.)
Anyway, I ignored him, thinking: "Crazy drunk man."

Then my kind and pure heart got the better of me and I thought, "Maybe he's not drunk. He's just trying to be nice. Maybe he's slow. What I thought was a drunken slur might actually be a speech impediment. He's fairly well-dressed. How harmful could he be?"

Needless to say he was just drunk. I think. And after being pressed mercilessly for information and asked for my phone number I made up the following lie.

My name is Sarah.
I go to GW. A sophomore, as it turns out.
Undeclared.
I work at a shoe store in Georgetown.

This was all "very impressive" to the slurring man.