My boss was confused, amused and then impressed today when I used the word "imbue" in a sentence.
I may be too well-educated to be working in retail.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
flooded
Do you know anyone incapable of using a washing machine without flooding their house?
No?
Now you do.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Cheerios of the future
These Cheerios are so tasty they cause people's mouths to move at a different rate than the words they're saying.
And look at that new-fangled box.
And look at that new-fangled box.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
3rd date rule
After a 3rd encounter in a friend group I maintain that it is well within social norms to go in for the hug. Particularly when the other party comes toward you with his or her arm out in the Pre-hug Position.
Do be warned however, that the Pre-hug Position bares striking resemblance to the beginnings of the Jovial Handshake.
And while the intentions of the Jovial Handshake and the hug may be identical, I warn the reader further that in the few seconds before contact is made (and recognition has dawned on one or both of the parties) the Pre-hug Position cannot be stealthily converted into the Jovial Handshake.
Unless your idea of stealth involves being smacked in the head while stepping on the other person's feet.
Do be warned however, that the Pre-hug Position bares striking resemblance to the beginnings of the Jovial Handshake.
And while the intentions of the Jovial Handshake and the hug may be identical, I warn the reader further that in the few seconds before contact is made (and recognition has dawned on one or both of the parties) the Pre-hug Position cannot be stealthily converted into the Jovial Handshake.
Unless your idea of stealth involves being smacked in the head while stepping on the other person's feet.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
To Resolve
Turns out I am now old enough, and boring enough, to feel motivated to make New Year's Resolutions.
1. I will be more socially active. The Canadian and I have discussed making a weekly happy hour commitment. This goes hand in hand with my vow to attend more social events/get out more/ make an effort to engage new people. Which is why I went out and was awkward at a party tonight instead of remaining on the couch, watching When Harry Met Sally.
2. I will read more. No one would ever know I was an English major in college. Or that I have literary inclinations. Or that I have a brain. That's because at some point I stopped reading very much. But I think I have figured out the cause of my delinquency, and so I directed myself into a non-fiction kick, which I expect to continue. Not because I declare it so, but because I want it so.
3. I will blog more. Ooooh, how meta.
1. I will be more socially active. The Canadian and I have discussed making a weekly happy hour commitment. This goes hand in hand with my vow to attend more social events/get out more/ make an effort to engage new people. Which is why I went out and was awkward at a party tonight instead of remaining on the couch, watching When Harry Met Sally.
2. I will read more. No one would ever know I was an English major in college. Or that I have literary inclinations. Or that I have a brain. That's because at some point I stopped reading very much. But I think I have figured out the cause of my delinquency, and so I directed myself into a non-fiction kick, which I expect to continue. Not because I declare it so, but because I want it so.
3. I will blog more. Ooooh, how meta.
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